119 Me, Me MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

How did you turn out? For that matter, how do you look at it? I feel like I'm a work in progress. Sometimes I get down, wondering why I wasnt a presidential candidate(work in progress w.i.p) or some famous writer or a lawyer or some such thing. How do we judge ourselves and by what standard?

Did your parents push you? Too hard? Too little? Did you want to be a stripper and wound up doing something you hate, like registered nurse? Did you want to be an architect or an engineer and instead you work in a factory making widgets? What's in a job, anyway? I wanted to be a soldier and a fireman and half a dozen other things when I was small. I managed to do both and a couple more for good measure. I've supervised people on several different levels in several different occupations and yet, deep down, I always wanted to be a writer.(for a paper or magazine) Small, local articles when I was in college, but alas, I had to wait 20 years and settle for facebook. Dont get me wrong, I like writing here. I can go at my own pace, post or not depending on whether I'm busy and the instant interaction is great.

I remember being encouraged to do whatever I wanted growing up. If I wanted to try taking a clock apart, fine. If I wanted to collect stamps, no problem. If I wanted to trade my infant sister for a tractor, well, that one didnt work out. True story, by the way. I've made it a habit to encourage our boys to excel at the things they want to try. It doesnt matter to me if they try a hundred things, I want them to get the experience for each endeavour and hopefully they'll take something away from them to be used somewhere down the road. Some parents urge their child to settle on one thing, master it and then apply it to the rest of their life. Nothing wrong with that, but I'm just not the kind of person that has the attention span for a lifetime of one thing. I DO tend to retain a lot of this and that, and it HAS come in handy over the years. Jack of all trades, master of none?

There is something to be said for a child picking up a vocation or a sport, mastering it and becoming Tiger Woods or Gloria Allred or to a lesser extent, Sarah Palin. The thing you have to keep in mind is that there are so many levels of society (professionals in sports/industry/teaching/etc, laborers, service, politics, you name it) that not everyone can be the best. We cant all be a PRO. There has to be people there to support the top and there are people behind them in one form or another supporting them and so on. I've told our boys that if they want to be (for example) a street sweeper, then do it right. All I ask of them beyond that is that they LIKE what they're doing. We've all seen parents who dont give their kids ANY kind of direction. There are the ones that will always drain our society, as well. I'm not going to apologize, we ALL know them. We see them feigning illness and injury to collect a check. We have seen the ones brought up in a welfare family and wind up being 2nd, 3d or fourth generation "reliefers". Unfortunately, there will always be that aspect of the bottom rungs, to include criminals of all levels. If they had had even half the parenting you did, how would they have turned out? If they would have had a mentor, even briefly, how would they be now?

I'll say it again: be happy with what you do. It all comes down to whether you like what you're doing and whether you can work with those around you. I dont think our kids making a vocation out of texting, messaging, or gaming qualifies. They cant(for the vast majority) rise to greatness or even self-fulfillment by perfecting texting.

I find myself being pridefull and harboring a secret hope that when Nick does well at football, he'll get a free ride to college, maybe go pro for a few years and then retire his parents. Yeah. Niiiicce. What? Oh, sorry. I was caught up there for a minute. It doesnt matter to me if it ever really happens, I'm allowed to hope. As long as he's doing good in school, playing well and enjoying himself, I feel we've done our job. Do you do that with the things your kids like? Have you maybe given a hint of direction or encouragement to a child not your own, one who you KNOW needed it?

As long as I dont guide another O.J. or Dick Cheney, I've done my job. If they live in a meager house, a modest one or a mansion, we've succeeded. If they raise a happy, healthy family, we were right. Dont judge your child by your accomplishments or accolades, let them get their own in their own way.

If they get rich, famous and still like you, you've REALLY won. Grandkids, cookouts and holidays that are happy and joyous are the rewards for what we sow now. We dont have to be the best at anything, we just need to bring that warm, fuzzy feeling that sounds cliche' as I write it, but when you get it, you know what you're doing is right. That may be the raspberry wine I'm sipping, but then again, maybe it's the keystrokes. meh... What's the difference? They both feel good.